It could be argued that people who don't know God have more genuine relationships than those tossed by religion in the church pews. I think love and acceptance can be conditional in certain church settings and relationships because of the mindset that, "Sin is dirty and I'm trying to be clean over here." If you've given your life to Jesus and started a relationship with Him, (in theory) you should be becoming that safe place for the lost. People who haven't been reconciled to God and are living in the ways of the world do some pretty interesting things. If you shudder at the thought of some of their perversion, how will you love them into freedom? They may never divulge the entirety of their life journeys, but what if sharing it and exposing their abuse brought them into a freedom and way of escape? I do not WANT to hear about sexual abuse, rape or torture, but I do WANT people to feel safe and be free with me. I desire their freedom more than my comfort. God isn't afraid of people's sin. He can never be surprised at what anyone does or says because He knows everything. But most importantly, He loves so passionately that as dirty as you may try to appear or sound to push people away... He doesn't see that on you. He's most concerned about directly taking on the role of Father and restoring your identity. Imagine if He wanted to use you in someone else's healing and freedom processes. It is a scary or exciting thought for you?
So... the reason for this blog today is that I've noticed a vast difference in certain friendships I currently maintain. While I understand that it is unwise to share everything with everyone, I do hold the people I deem "friends" to high standards. Most of my friendships are with saved Christians. I can't speak for every Christian and I won't attempt to take on such a responsibility. But personally, my thoughts and actions aren't always pretty. I need help from God and others A LOT. My freedom comes when I can be weak and honestly tell you what I'm dealing with. Sin, sin mindsets, etc., like to hide in darkness. Simply exposing to someone what you're dealing with provides a degree of freedom because now you're not alone in what you're facing. Depending on their maturity level and how well they love, they can pray with you, provide a different perspective, or best yet, provide a Kingdom perspective. Your mind can be renewed at a time of weakness when you're in a safe place.
God is bigger than any box in which we'd try to place Him. He doesn't always need to use people, but in His compassionate mercy, He chooses to sometimes. He can and is that Safe Place. But He also provides safety in Himself through others... or at least it's something He desires to do.
I want to be a better friend. I think we can all improve in this area. I would suggest that we all ask the Lord if there's anything He desires us to change in the way we relate to or love our friends. Perhaps you're not ready to be a safe place for someone. It's still better to know that now, then when that friend is in a time of need. Be honest in your relationships.
To those that have been unable to accept me in my ugly forms, I forgive you. To those that have been safe places to me at my times of weakness and low points in life, I thank you. Kris Vallotton teaches in his podcast teaching entitled, "Living in the Secret Place," that it's the people that believe in you more than you believe in yourself that call you up into your destiny. Thanks guys for calling me up. You know who you are. <3
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