Lost

Recently I went with my sister to get matching tattoos.  This was something we wanted to do for a while and not a last minute decision.  Because they are forever, I recommend intense consideration and deep thought beforehand.  I am not one of those Christians that are opposed to tattoos (obviously).   I think, just like anything else, your motives for your actions are what’s important.  Immoral actions are obviously something different altogether.  But in general, those everyday life choices that aren’t necessarily discussed in the Bible are between you and Holy Spirit.  I am not your conscious or your Holy Ghost.  He leads and guides into all truth.  Not me.  OK.  Glad we’re clear.

You must know that whenever I get a tattoo, it usually translates to a life message the Lord is working in me, or will work in me for a lifetime.  The hope anchor tattoo on my foot was just one outward way the Lord sealed a message in my heart that would be proclaimed until I lay down my life.  It has since translated into a battle I fight often with hopelessness.

So, like I said, about two weeks ago we went to get matching sister tats.  It was going to be a small tattoo of the ASL sign for ‘I love you.’  We both wanted to also get individual tattoos at the same time.  This decision also came after much thought from both of us.

I’ve always been the type of person who needed, or at least wanted, a plan.  I have a very type A personality.  So, after getting saved in college, this character trait did translate into the Kingdom.  However, God is not obliged to give us His plan.  He decides what revelation or information we receive.  I think we play a part in that too, but mainly, He is the all-knowing One and knows what we can handle.  As a young Christian, I would often pray for direction, that I would know what the Lord wanted me to do and be able to choose according to His will.  The prayer itself was not a bad one.  But it was based in a fear of failure.  God is so aware of us, our personalities, His plans for us, our quirks, etc., that He planned for every decision we would every make, good or bad.  And the awesome part is His love is the same. 
 
For months, I have wanted a compass tattooed on my heart.  My early compulsion to know the right way has evolved into a desire to know my own path and calling from the perspective of knowing who I am and why the Lord created me.  I think it is vital to know ourselves, our boundaries, our desires and also to know exactly how the Lord feels about us.  There are obvious flaws and weaknesses that we are all too familiar with.  There is no escaping ourselves, except maybe through denial, which is NOT recommended.  These personal imperfections should not make us devalue ourselves.  I find that I have to guard my heart against condemnation when I learn something else about myself that isn’t Christ-like.  While He is forgiving of me, I deal with the challenge to be as forgiving of myself. 

Compass symbol tattooed on my heart by Pat at Red Octopus Tattoos

So, this bloody compass (insert British accent)… I love it.  I looks awesome.  The tattoo artist did a great job.  But the inner work that has accompanied it has been sobering and scary.  For me, it’s been a season of great transition to the point where I’m in an unfamiliar area and feeling a bit lost.  While I sense His presence a little more than I did before this move, I still am quite unsure of what lies ahead.  This makes me so uncomfortable and has shown me areas of distrust in my heart towards God.

We all have various challenges in our walk with Him.  Those more laid back folks that primarily frolic through the tulips may find greater difficulty in knowing and following a plan.  Nobody’s grass is greener per say.  It’s just different.

My encouragement to those reading today would be that in your season of transition, God has not forgotten you and STILL knows His plans for you.  They are good plans and contain good things.  He has a future planned for you that you actually desire for yourself (Jeremiah 29;11).  Also know that in your battles, mentally, spiritually or physically, what you are actually fighting is the belief of  a lie or lies.  Let me explain.  So for me, the lies I’m fighting against are: I’m lost;  I have no direction; God is not aware of me or what I’m going through; God doesn’t care what I’m going through; (AND THE BIGGEST LIE EVER) God doesn’t love me.  Usually trials are just a battle of what you choose to believe.

So as my great friend Eve Hemby once told me, “When you don’t have faith, take hope.  When there appears to be no hope, rest in His love for you.”  

Picture via Pinterest. Getting lost with God only means you don't know where you're going. He does.

God can use... me??!!!

I think everyone at some point wonders if God will actually use him or her.  I mean, we're talking great God of the universe choosing to use us personally to show off how awesome He is through us.  Through me, even.  We can all say it.  The "me" makes it personal.  It is something I think about.  And then He reminds me of things He's already done that I didn't think would ever happen, like my first mission trip to India (yep... we're going there).

So, let me back up by saying, I'm no one special.  Okay... okay.  To a good father, any child of his is special.  I'm talking in general.  I was born into a "middle-class" family.  My parents divorced when I was young.  I got saved in college and thus began my journey in Christianity.  After a couple of years of attending a good, Bible-teaching church and just living life, I began hungering for more.  The more I couldn't really name or put my finger on exactly.  I just knew there had to be more of God to be seen and experienced in my life.

My friends were hungry, too.  So three of us started meeting after Bible study to seek God's face.  We would fellowship, talk about God, and pray.  We were consistent, and our group grew and changed.  Better than our consistency, was God's.  He would teach us through one another, sharing revelation with us that we would share with the group.  It was good.  There were challenges that we faced.  I think anything that starts good in God will have to face the temptation of becoming religious.  If you're not following what God is doing presently, it's easy to base your game plan on what He's already done.  This isn't necessarily bad if it's still what He's doing or telling you to do.  But it can hinder you and others if it's not what He's currently,actively doing.  He stewards us well.  He also gives us things to steward.  It's important to let Him train our spirits to know what He's doing and to run with Him.  Anyway, we faced the challenge of doing things the same way every time because frankly, He stopped doing things the same way.  We didn't immediately spot our religiousness, and it wasn't intentional.  But we were hungry enough that we kept seeking His face.  It's a good place to be hungry for Jesus, where nothing but He, Himself, satisfies.

So after about 15 months of this prayer group which had now grown to 11-12, in a seemingly strange twist of fate which could only be God's divine on-time arrangement, we got an invitation to India.  This would be my first mission trip, first time leaving the country, and first time experiencing something obviously bigger than myself.  I was scared and filled with doubt.  Why us?  Why me?  Being consistent in a prayer group and having a hunger for God didn't seem to be good enough qualifications for this kind of trip.  As we went through the motions of getting everything in order like passports, visas, etc., it became more and more real that this was actually going to happen.  All except, nobody knew how we were really going to pay for our plane tickets.  We didn't let that stop us from taking care of what we could afford to this point.  But God in His grace, put favor in the hearts of some good people to cover our airfare!!  It was official.  India, here we come.

Photo courtesy of Pinterest

Twelve of us went to India in April 2010.  I had only been saved since April 2003.  I was one of the youngest in the Lord of our group.  I still felt (and feel) like I had so much to learn.  Our point of contact was an Indian pastor named Bishop Jacob.  His testimony alone could bring anyone to tears.  He was diagnosed with a fatal disease as a young boy.  The doctors sentenced him to death, telling his parents to take him home to die.  On their journey back home, they heard of some Christian missionaries in a certain, nearby village.  They prayed for him, and that evening, he had a personal visit from Jesus Himself.  Jesus healed him and gave him a new name (Jacob).  Subsequently, he and his entire family gave their lives to Jesus.  In India, being a Christian demotes you to the lowest point on the caste system.  You are pretty much sentenced to being exiled.  And they didn't care.  After knowing what the Lord had done, they couldn't turn back.  He and his family sacrificed daily to follow Jesus.  Since their decision, this man has faced persecution and has been abducted by militant men with his life threatened many times.  It's amazing what people do and sacrifice to follow the Lord.

Bishop Jacob and his wife Elizabeth. Picture taken by Ashley Wilson.

For about 10 days, we were in India.  We went to many villages and would be featured guests in services usually held at mud hut churches.  We danced, sang, taught, and prayed with the people.  In every meeting, the people filled the building and spilled onto the outside porches.  Many would travel miles to see us, the "special" visitors.  We met awesome children, whose natural parents were dead, but they had been taken into the care of Bishop Jacob and his staff.  He has hundreds of children that he clothes, feeds and teaches, for the purposes of giving them a livelihood as adults.  Human trafficking is real issue in India.  Without education, a desired skill set, parents, etc., kids have zero chance of survival in some areas.  We also faced spiritual warfare and had very real threats from militant hostiles in the area.  For me, it became very real, as we drove through random checkpoints, where people carried machine guns.  I wasn't ready to die for Christ then.  I was scared.  Some of people of the group were laughing and singing in this face of fear.  I, however, was praying.  Miraculously, the two vans we were traveling in were not stopped and we drove away unharmed. *praise break*

5 of the 12 at the first leper colony. Photography by Ashley Wilson.

I learned a lot about myself in India.  I learned that I hate heat.  During the days, we faced 120+ degrees of heat.  The mission bases were equipped with fans and windows, but no air conditioning.  The electricity was pretty inconsistent, so your fan wasn't guaranteed to work.  If you were asleep when the fans cut off, you would quickly wake up as every pore of your body began to sweat.  I learned I wasn't secure in my identity in Christ.  I doubted much of what I thought He said I was called to do because of my lack of confidence in this place.  Some of the people I traveled with seemed to thoroughly enjoy most of the happenings of our adventures.  Some were moving in the prophetic and spiritual gifts while my Jesus was quiet.  And while I was honored to meet these awesome people, who had such a hot, passionate hunger for the real Jesus, I was out of my element in so many ways.  Talk about uncomfortable.

I don't want to paint an ugly picture of India.  The people there are utterly beautiful.  I wouldn't trade any of those experiences for anything.  What I valued the most was the hunger in those people. He is the Desire of the nations.  During one of the last days in India, we attended a pastors' conference.  Those men danced for hours, unaffected by the heat, in praise to God.  These men face persecution every day.  They could be killed for their faith.  Their families could be ravaged and killed, too.  But the honor of knowing Him is far too great for them to let go in the faces of danger and death.

Now, looking back, I know that trip probably changed me more than the people I touched there.  I know that being a Christian is NOT about going to church a couple times a week, singing songs, and going home.  It's about knowing a living God, who is doing things ALL around the world.  It's about letting the personal relationship I have with Jesus fill me up and change me with His love.  Then I live in response to His love.  This changes everything.

So you think God can't use you?  If you're hungry, He can. If you're not hungry, ask Him to give you a holy hunger that cannot be satisfied until your chewing on the Bread of Life and giving it to the starving others you encounter.  But really, He can use a rock if He wants to.  He can use an unbeliever.  Nothing is impossible with God.  He just wants to show you that there's hope even in you.
  

Leslie and I praying for a child.  Picture courtesy of Ashley Wilson.

Check out Bishop Jabob's website: http://www.gtsss.org/

The God Who breaks the mold

It's been a long time... shouldn't of left you without... some words to think about.  I think I spotted some old Aaliyah fans in that opener.  Gotcha.

Anyway, sorry that it's been awhile folks.  Sometimes, during certain seasons, the best way to be is quiet and hidden.  It's important to know where you are in the process or the "seasons" of God.  Naturally speaking, we have four seasons, and we typically know what to expect during them.  Even then, there's still the unseasonably warm or cold day despite the season encasing us.  Thankfully, Holy Spirit makes us aware of where we are, and if we don't know, He's always there to ask.

So personally, God has been breaking some religious molds in my thinking that I didn't necessarily know were there until this confrontation.  Everybody has a different story unique to him or her.  I didn't grow up in church.  But, I prayed.  I believed in God, but really had no knowledge of Him.  I knew He was there, but He was pretty busy, and hopefully He heard my prayers.  It wasn't until college that He knocked on the door of my heart and I let Him in.  Since then, it's been an adventure... and still is.

When I was young in the Lord, I had such a hunger to know Him.  Personally, my truth gauge wasn't super accurate then.  There were foundational truths that were laid in me that weren't entirely pure.  I didn't know it then, but those things would be confronted in order for me to grow in my relationship with God.

It's important to learn the lessons God is teaching you in the season you're in.  My lessons probably aren't your lessons, or they might be learned in a different time.  But God is so good that we can glean off of one another's experiences and the wisdom we gained from God.  And no matter what He's saying to you, it's vital that we understand the interpretation.  Sometimes when God talks to me, I think I know what He means by what He says, but often, I don't.  I've found that His words to me are often leading me deeper into His heart.  For me, my answer isn't always on the surface. This makes sense to me because I'm learning Him to be the God of relationship.  Rolland Baker, an awesome missionary in Mozambique, writes, "God actually designs and creates our relationship with Him, and that is to the ultimate product of His creativity, which is designed to satisfy, first of all, Himself" (Wilson, 82).  He later writes, "He has reasons for what He does and doesn't do.  I think relationship is His primary object, not just amazing people with magic tricks or providing whatever it is they want unless His priorities stand" (Wilson, 84).  We were made for Him and made for relationship.

God doesn't lock Himself in to be the same God to you as He does to someone else.  Your relationship with Him is completely unique to who you are and who He is.  The combination you two make together, is a totally new combination than anyone else's relationship with Him.  This emphasizes the need for you to know Him for yourself and realize the greater truth lies in what God is saying to you or doing in you.  A dear friend of mine, Eve, encouraged me once by saying, "No other person's encounter should be greater than the one you had with God yourself.  There's no faith in finding the greatness of another person's encounter and belittling your own."  There still needs to be an honor for people, as not to belittle or disrespect their process.  But there also needs to be an appreciation for what He's doing in your own personal life.

So, while I was somewhat vague in the mold I had of God, the take-home message today is: if there are cracks of impurity in your foundational truths, let God be the Construction worker that fixes it.  Don't let negative life experiences or circumstances cement your theology.  Your view of God is not meant to be confined to a box your made, but to expand into the vastness of His goodness.

When Hope dwindles...

Sometimes it can be easy to get caught up in the busyness of life.  Depending on your work situation and family life, there can be many things that require your attention and focus.  These responsibilities have the potential to drain you of energy and joy.  A job isn't evil and neither is family (obviously).  It simply reveals the need to have an avenue where God can flow in and out of you at any given moment.  It's not that He leaves us, but our awareness of Him can wax and wane.

Recently, I found myself in this kind of busy life situation.  The commitments I agreed to simply began to overwhelm me.  I felt more anger and frustration than I had in awhile.  My hope was dwindling.  I felt like a victim, like I had no control of what was going on.  During this time, it became evident to me that maintaining a superficial conversation with God wasn't going to cut it.  I missed Him.  I needed Him to be my reality.

So, I made it a point to make the necessary sacrifices so that despair wouldn't overtake me.  I didn't have hours to spare, but the time I did have, I offered it to God.  I went away to be with Him.  Initially this started with alone time in my bedroom, but when the Lord comes to me, it seems like I'm everywhere and nowhere all at the same time.  He reminded me of previous moments we've shared, things He's said to me, and promises He has made to me.  He even led me to specific journal entries from years ago.  I love when He shows me I'm not crazy.  :)

When we haven't spent a lot of time with God, we can often feel guilt or condemnation.  Some may even think they deserve the negative circumstances they are in because of their lack of fellowship time with God.  But allowing this to happen disregards Jesus' sacrifice for us.  He's death, blood, and resurrection made way for us to have full access to the Father and to Himself.  To think we have to earn our way back to His heart, His ear, or His face is inaccurate and insulting to His blood.  He died for sins past, present, and future.  Does this mean we should sin purposely because we always have a way back?  The Apostle Paul and I say, "Duh... no," (paraphrased in Romans 6).  If you care about someone, you do not purposely hurt him or her.  It's the same with the Lord.  Jesus is a person.  He is God.  Our choices about what we do with our time and attention affect Him.  Have you ever been in love?  If you have, then you understand what it's like to want to spend the majority of your time with that special someone, wrapped in his or her arms, being affectionate and just spending time together.  Well, need I say any more about the similar desires of God towards us?  The God who rescued and rescues us from death, sin, and the effects thereof?

None of this is meant to make anyone feel bad about choices they may have made in the past.  You might still be busy with school, work, a spouse, and/or children.  You may have only minutes a day to offer to God.  But know in your offering, it's not being offered because you will fall or fail if you don't do it.  It's because He loves you and wants to remind you that He never left, that you have a future and a greater hope.  I'm convinced there are ways to access Him continually throughout our day.  I hope to discover  them soon.

So, as a reminder... no matter what your life looks like right now, nothing can separate you from the hot, passionate, love of God.  Sometimes we just need to know He's there, living life with us, and ready to offer us better ways to live and to think.  Know you've been forgiven and He wants to spend time with you.  When you notice hope or joy dwindling, invite Him into your day.  Ask Him to speak to you.  Remind Him you haven't forgotten Him.  Be affectionate, either out loud or quietly.  It's always been about relationship.  He still loves us... and He always will.

Hope found in the safe places...

I love finding people who are a safe places.  I also love when God shows me which people are safe places.  To me, a safe place is someone I can truly be myself with, exposing the good and the bad, and not fearing judgment, condemnation, or rejection.

It could be argued that people who don't know God have more genuine relationships than those tossed by religion in the church pews.  I think love and acceptance can be conditional in certain church settings and relationships because of the mindset that, "Sin is dirty and I'm trying to be clean over here."  If you've given your life to Jesus and started a relationship with Him, (in theory) you should be becoming that safe place for the lost.  People who haven't been reconciled to God and are living in the ways of the world do some pretty interesting things.  If you shudder at the thought of some of their perversion, how will you love them into freedom?  They may never divulge the entirety of their life journeys, but what if sharing it and exposing their abuse brought them into a freedom and way of escape?  I do not WANT to hear about sexual abuse, rape or torture, but I do WANT people to feel safe and be free with me.  I desire their freedom more than my comfort.  God isn't afraid of people's sin.  He can never be surprised at what anyone does or says because He knows everything. But most importantly, He loves so passionately that as dirty as you may try to appear or sound to push people away... He doesn't see that on you.  He's most concerned about directly taking on the role of Father and restoring your identity.  Imagine if He wanted to use you in someone else's healing and freedom processes.  It is a scary or exciting thought for you?

So... the reason for this blog today is that I've noticed a vast difference in certain friendships I currently maintain.  While I understand that it is unwise to share everything with everyone, I do hold the people I deem "friends" to high standards.  Most of my friendships are with saved Christians.  I can't speak for every Christian and I won't attempt to take on such a responsibility.  But personally, my thoughts and actions aren't always pretty.  I need help from God and others A LOT.  My freedom comes when I can be weak and honestly tell you what I'm dealing with.  Sin, sin mindsets, etc., like to hide in darkness. Simply exposing to someone what you're dealing with provides a degree of freedom because now you're not alone in what you're facing.  Depending on their maturity level and how well they love, they can pray with you, provide a different perspective, or best yet, provide a Kingdom perspective.  Your mind can be renewed at a time of weakness when you're in a safe place.

God is bigger than any box in which we'd try to place Him.  He doesn't always need to use people, but in His compassionate mercy, He chooses to sometimes.  He can and is that Safe Place.  But He also provides safety in Himself through others... or at least it's something He desires to do.

I want to be a better friend.  I think we can all improve in this area.  I would suggest that we all ask the Lord if there's anything He desires us to change in the way we relate to or love our friends.  Perhaps you're not ready to be a safe place for someone.  It's still better to know that now, then when that friend is in a time of need.  Be honest in your relationships.

To those that have been unable to accept me in my ugly forms, I forgive you.  To those that have been safe places to me at my times of weakness and low points in life, I thank you.  Kris Vallotton teaches in his podcast teaching entitled, "Living in the Secret Place," that it's the people that believe in you more than you believe in yourself that call you up into your destiny.  Thanks guys for calling me up.  You know who you are.  <3

Graphic from Pinterest.com

Hopeful ramblings...

"Process."  It can be an icky word for some.  For  others, it inspires hope.  Everybody is in a process.  God is working in everyone whether we know it or care to acknowledge it.  He has a special purpose and plan for everyone.  In order to see that plan fulfilled, certain events are allowed in one's life, not all at the hand of God however.  One of the most fundamental beliefs for anyone to accept and believe wholeheartedly is that God is good.  Life events might not reveal this truth.  Some Christians may not reflect this truth.  But does falsehood alter truth?  Definitely not.  Lies exist because a liar exists.  Evil exists because free will and sin exist.  Do these things affect or change the goodness of God?  Nope.  Not at all.

I realize that there are many truths that people can hear but not really trust or understand until they experience it for themselves.  Encountering God is a very personal matter.  He knows how to reach everyone, and everyone is redeemable.

Initially I started writing this post because I felt excited after reading 1 John 2 where he talks about knowing all things because you have an unction/anointing from God.  Later in the same chapter, John says that the anointing teaches you to abide in God.  I want to emphasize that the anointing teaches.  God gives you something that you hold inside.  I'd like to think it's Holy Spirit and His enabling ability.  But the awesome thing is here that God Himself wants to teach us.  There is still a need for the five fold ministry gifts of pastors and teachers.  There is a need for fellowship with other believers because of our inherent desires to love and be loved.  But God, with His awesome Triune-being self, wants to teach us.  Wisdom can come from anywhere.  He's given us ears to hear Him.  Romans 10:17 says faith comes by hearing.  It's our job to hear His voice.

This relates to your process because sometimes a man won't have your answer.  A friend may not drip with the wisdom of God.  We have to remember that God wants to teach us, wherever we are.  He's good.  Vital truth #2:  God loves me.  Before we can change the world and affect the masses for kingdom advancement, I pray that God, in His sweetness, will teach us these truths and cement them in our core:  God is good and He loves me.

He doesn't leave you alone in the process.  You've been redeemed and you have hope. Grab His hand, if you're not already squeezing it tightly, and don't let go.

Hope defined... kinda...

I feel like there are a lot of words we use in Christianity today that we might think we understand but not really know how to put into words (i.e., faith, hope, love, honor, etc.).  Well,  if this is the case, I'd like to propose we don't really know what those words mean.  In some instances, you may not have the language for it yet.  But for me, I know that some things the Lord has to reveal or define before I really comprehend it with my soul and my mind.

The Lord had been highlighting the word "hope" to me for months in closing of 2011 until the present.  There are quite a few scriptures that I've read that talk about hope, but I couldn't really find one that defined it for me.  I think that was because God wanted to do it Himself.  You can have a head knowledge of ideas,words, etc., but until God enlightens your thinking and encounters your heart, it simply just an idea, something you don't necessarily integrate into your life.

Until my actual encounters and revelations from God about hope, Bill Johnson defined it for me in one of his podcasts from iBethel (available on iTunes) called 2012 - A Year of Promise.  Bill Johnson and several other teachers from Bethel Church in Redding, CA., often speak about things the Lord has pre-heated me for.  He warms me up to receive the heavenly downloads so I'll know in my heart that He's talking through these men of God.  He said (paraphrased), "Hope is not a wish.  Biblical hope is the joyful anticipation for good.  It is the absolute rock solid assurance that something wonderful is about to happen and I am leaning into it.  I am in expectation for this to happen."  He further encouraged, "Position yourself as a warrior of hope, learning how to cultivate an abiding faith."  This teaching brought further insight into what the Lord was working in me.

My pastor, Tony Brazelton, said something awesome about hope during an altar call where he encouraged many of the people who responded by coming to the front for prayer.  He said (paraphrased) those that feel hopeless are often called to bring hope to others.  Often what God calls you to do and graces you to do seems like the opposite of what you experience.  Without divine insight and a relationship with Holy Spirit, it is possible to be unaware of what you're called to do or release to others.

As one who has experienced depression, low self-esteem, and hopelessness, it somehow makes sense that I would be chosen of the Lord to release hope to the hopeless.  It's something He deposited in me.  It's not something I worked up.  It's now something I can release because of the Holy Spirit at work in me, as I work with Him.

Luke 4:18-19 (KJV) ~  The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the broken-hearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised.  To preach the acceptable year of the Lord. (...the day when salvation and free favors of God profusely abound - AMP).

This statement was made as Jesus recognized His personal mission statement and assignment from the Father.  It is important that we all get our purpose and identity from Him.  No one else can correctly identify who you are except the God that made you.  And really... really, ALL He made was and is good.

So what about hope?  The definition I now take as my own, until more is revealed to me, has become more personal and simplified.  I define hope as, "my expectation to experience God's goodness in my life.... (and the lives of others."  I realized that I must experience hope for and in my own life before having real hope for others.  And it is the way of the Father to spread goodness to all.  No one is excluded from it.  Once you've been converted, strengthen your brethren (VCMI vision).

My friend, Ernest, has been on this hope journey too.  Through various scriptures and God encounters, he  shared his definition of hope:
      "HOPE: the act of believing and expecting that GOD [the greatest and richest father imaginable] will reach into HIS infinite treasury of GLORY [and] place in our hearts (our personalities) strength, might and power through HOLY SPIRIT, making our hearts CHRIST'S home; believing that HE will deeply root and ground us in HIS love; apprehending and comprehending by experience GOD's love beyond our natural knowledge or our wildest dreams until we are completely filled and overflowing with HIM; the utter rejection of fear!"

If God has been highlighting, or drawing your attention to certain truths, He is the best one to tell you what He means and how it relates to your life.  Other great men and/or women of God may be able to assist you in this process, but ultimately this Christian walk is about your own personal relationship with the Lord.  Relationships with others are significant.  The five-fold ministry has its place.  But God has been consistently telling me, "It's about you and me."  He's the One I can hope in.

Reconciled

Recently the Lord has been speaking to me and highlighting the subject of reconciliation.  A relatively large amount of Christians I know do not approach God from the standpoint of already being reconciled, but still separated from a loving Father, unsure of His will towards them to do good.  The definition of reconcile (dictionary.com), paraphrased by yours truly, simply means to bring back into good relationship (definitions 2-5 from the referenced website are good reads).  It's the bridging of the gap between two parties or two people that were once separated by something.  Many people approach God as if they still need to be brought back into right standing with Him. Statements of unworthiness and songs with lyrics that illustrate this press, having to put forth some kind of arduous effort to be heard or seen of Him prove that there is some kind of deception lingering in the minds of many.  The Amplified Bible version of 2 Corinthians 5:19 says it so well: "It was God [personally present] in Christ reconciling and restoring the world to favor with Himself, not counting up and holding against [men] their trespasses [but cancelling them], and committing to us the message of reconciliation (of the restoration to favor.)"  He's not an angry God who sits up in heaven counting our sins of the past, present and future.  He is a loving Father awaiting our attention so that we can hang out (aka fellowship).
My stance towards God in my relating to Him and my prayer life change when I realize in my heart that I'm already reconciled by His efforts and not my earning it.  It allows me to come boldly to the throne of grace (Heb 4:16) as opposed to sheepishly saying, "Lord, if it be Your will..."

So, to briefly sum up til next time: Ask Holy Spirit if you're approaching God from the proper standpoint.  Do I already view myself as being reconciled?  Do I interact with God as if He's an estranged Father?  Let Holy Spirit reveal truth to you and allow Him to minister to your heart if there's any corrections or adjustments that need to be made in your heart so that you can relate to God better.

I realize there are many factors in relating well to God.  This is just one topic He started to speak to me about.  It changed how I came to God.  I was no longer bringing feelings of shame or guilt, but realizing I'm already in right relationship with the Father because of what Jesus did for me.  Without touching the subject of repentance, our overall view of God affects how we approach Him.  Let this new aspect of being reconciled permeate you heart so He can take you deeper into hope and His vast love for you.

Opening Statements

Photography by Ashley Wilson


Hi all.  Just thought I should give you something to warm up to in getting ready for me.  The following are simply my beliefs as I search for deeper truths in Jesus Christ.  He definitely is the Truth and is the Door to the Father.  But if He's the Door, He provides entrance to a whole new world and reality.  Both 'world' and 'reality' could be made into their plural form, as there is no limit to His creative power.  I do not intend to debate anyone or anything.  If you don't agree with what is posted, don't read anymore.  It is my heart to show that what Jesus died and rose to give us is for our present reality, to change our lives NOW, and not when we die and go to heaven.  He provides the hope I need to see and experience Heaven on earth.

Hope is etched in my skin  - Design from the Lord.  Reference Hebrews 6:19